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The Evil King Eisner - A Disney Fairy Tale
Author: Gregory Isaac
PubDate: 03/06/04

I wrote this poem as an assignment for sociology class. We were supposed to write a fairy tale, and I thought "Hey I can both do this assignment and help spread the word about Michael Eisner." (This poem was linked to on Roy Disney's SaveDisney.com in July 2005.) So without further adu, here's the story:

The evil king had ruled for 20 years,
And had not always been feared,
But since 1994, when Frank Wells died,
Eisner has been riding a destructive tide.

There was another kingdom, a few years ago,
That made a billion dollars a year, and so,
Eisner purchased it, for 19 billion,
And now ABC broadcasting makes only 39 million.

Disney had animation in Florida and Burbank,
But Eisner told all those in Florida “good night.”
He got rid of half of his 2D animation
Because Pixar’s the new thing, all across the nation
But he has problems with Pixar too,
He tried to cheat them, so they said “toodo lu.”

All this and more is what Eisner has done.
He has killed magic for profits, he thinks it is fun.

Roy Disney, Walt’s nephew, has taken this fight to heart
You can help too, go to savedisney.com to start
This brings about the resignation of Roy Disney and Stanley Gold
But the true drama is yet to unfold.

And sensing the weakness that Michael has brought
The proposal was made for Disney to be bought
That bid of $66 billion was made by Comcast
But that all-stock-offer has momentarily past.

But the worst thing of all that this fiend has brought
Is the 65 episode rule that, must be, fought
It limits creativity, by capping Disney shows
At 65, arbitrary, why? No one knows
Eisner seems to believe it will increase profits
But ideas cost money, this wrong needs a fix.
Two shows on Disney Channel today
Have already fallen prey
“Even Stevens” and “Lizzie McGuire”
Have been pushed by Eisner into the fire.

Seeing this a new group of heroes stood up
Determined feed the 65 rule to a pup
They founded Mission Kim Possible, a Yahoo! Group
With the goal of saving “Kim Possible” from Eisner’s coup.
If you haven’t seen Kim Possible then you are not alone
I’d give you background, but this isn’t an epic poem.
So watch it on Disney channel at 5, 4 central.
Well at least while it’s still around.

Eisner must be removed. This one thing is true.
On March 3rd the major shareholder’s flew.
Philadelphia was the place they were seeking
For there, on March 3rd, was the shareholder’s meeting.
And there the meeting was held
And there all the opposition had meld(ed)
It was there the vote was cast
43 percent voted to leave Eisner in the past
The roles of Chairman and CEO were divided
Eisner kept one and now it’s all ridin’
On George Mitchell, who is now Chairman
This is truly the beginning of the end.

And will Eisner endure? Certainly not
Even if he survives this threat, no allies has he got
It is clear that his days are numbered
For he has woken the people from their slumber

Orginally Published on here my GeoCities website.